My Autistic Sister Lucky.

(My sisters name has been changed from personal preference)

When I was younger having an autistic sister was very hard for me. Sometimes I felt embarrassed, somethings I felt like she got more attention, sometimes my heart would break because she wasn't like me and sometimes I would shy away from being a good sister because I always felt guilty for not being a good enough sister. Lucky always had short hair when we were younger. When i was about 4 or 5, I decided to cut all my long curly locks to be just like her. I left the hair along the sidewalk and on our neighbors porch.

One day we were at the swimming pool and some stupid lady said to my sister, "this isn't the boys locker room," I loudly and NOT politely screamed at the lady stating that "Lucky is my sister, you dumb lady!!" I'm sure she meant no harm but i did mean to stand up for my beautiful sister. It was extremely hard for me when I got to high school and she was changing and becoming more familiar with life's natural experiences. She had taken my pants (again!!!!) and a note was left in the pocket. It was to her boyfriend!!! I couldn't bear sitting in class. I ran outside and couldn't breath. It was to overwhelming for me to handle. I wanted my big sister to stay innocent forever!

For some reason it was extremely hard for me to be my sister's role model. When she started idolising me, i absolutely hated it. I didn't want her to want to be me. I wanted her to be my role model. I wanted to idolize MY older sister. It took for me to move to Alaska and then off to college that this was o.k. I gave her every high school club shirt and her favorite was my Madrigal jacket. I know she felt so proud every time she put it on!!! I know I'm not perfect but it was in those times that I wished I had not been afraid of her being my best friend.

It's been way to long since I've seen my sister and i miss her dearly. It's so hard for me to know she cant have some of the same blessing that I've been able to experience in my life. Sometimes it's just to hard to handle. But in the end I am reminded by a few words that my mother sings" God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son." It's more then overwhelming to know that when the right time comes my sister will be become perfect next to my side!!! What an amazing day to look forward to.

Being Adopted

Today I had a cool experience. Today I stood in a line with a man, his hair looked like it hadn't been washed for days, his cloths looked ragged and torn. His countenance was one to fear but i was able to see a different side. I went to donate plasma today, i had a couple free hours because my boys were in Perry. This man told me he goes twice a week four weeks a month, becasue he doesn't have a job. I was studying for my abuse and neglect test and had my notes in hand. While donating he leaned over and said poliety

"Can i ask you a question," "Yes" I anwsered.
"I would be careful going into a field like that," he said. Why? I asked
"You have to deal with a lot of mean people," he said.
"My sons got taken away from me becasue I was smoking pot,"
I said " I was taken away from my home to when i was younger becasue I was in an abusive and neglectful situation to,"
"I know you loved you boys and I know that it was hard for you but i couldn't be more gratful for what my mother did for me when she gave me what i really needed"
I want to teach others that it's possible to have a really bad experience when young but still SUCCEED!
He started to cry, it was so sad. In that moment I had a much greater understanding of a man I though i never thought possible. At the same moment I couldn't be more grateful for my blessings and being adopted.
He had nothing else to say but that he though women were evil and the world is going to end in 2012.

When i got up I said to never give up, and to have a super amazing day :D
Sometimes you have to wonder if you made a difference, I hope somehow i did. 

TOdaY

Today is to forgive
Today is to not judge
Today is to know people make mistakes
Today is to stand up for what you believe
Today is to know people can change, if they desire 
Nobody else
Today is to smile
Today is to wonder
Today is to ponder

Today i want to scream
Today i want to fight
Today i dont understand
Today the world is changing
Today i get confused
Today i want to cry
Today my heart breaks
Today i question
Today i feel lost 

Today i pray
Today i know it will be alright
Today i know that God will protect me
Today i understand 
Today i need not worry
Today i feel comfort
Today i feel close

I know that today i must not worry about the past or fear the future, i must make today amazing and yes only I can truly make today amazing. 

Asher Wallace Lyon

These amazing picture were taken by Monarch Photography at Lanaya's wedding. Lanaya's wedding was fabulous. The temple was a special experience with a very amazing feeling. I could tell by watching Clark and Lanaya that they would be an incredible pair. I absolutely love this picture of Asher. He is a heart breaker. He is growing up so fast. I wanted to write some of my favorite things he does.

He is an amazing climber, seriously he can climb anything AND get back down
He will dance if you turn on music, it's my favorite thing in the world
He cuddles in the morning for about 7 min, that's a pretty long time
He gives little kisses, it's so cute and I can never get enough of them
He loves his daddy and cries when he leaves the house for school
He waves goodbye with his precious little hands
He really likes eggs, yogurt and anything sweet!
He is really smart and makes we worried he will out-do his parents
Asher is the sweetest thing you will ever meet, we are truly blessed to have such a sweet spirit in our home.

Deepness and Strength

You know those days when you have so many things running through your head and you just don't know what to do with all of them. Well I've had a couple of those days in a row.

1. I love days when you have a good glace at how amazing life really is. We only get to be on this earth for one lifetime. It's amazing the things that change in your mind when you hear about a tragedy on the news, watch a turning movie, or somebody does something extremely amazing and it inspires you.

2. I love the feeling when life is really hard and you only have a sliver of a light at the end of the long tunnel but you have enough stranght to honestly feel like everything will work out incredibly.

3. I love days when i relize how spoiled i was growing up. Someday I miss the days when my parents took care of my every need and my worries were over what kind of cookies to make. There is such a good feeling in my heart when i know that i will be able to do great things for my children.

4. I get overwhelmed with love in my heart when i think of my savior and those up in heaven who watch over me. I am me and I am blessed immeasurably. I love those days when you can serve others and know you made a difference.

SChoOl

I honestly love school. Is that crazy, to some it might be. Once I had Asher it was no longer really a "have to" but a "privilege". Thomas is really an angel and works with my schedule without any complaint. I love his stink-en gutts. I also really enjoy my classes. I'm talking 14 credit right now, more then i have ever taken since i've had Asher and it's surprisingly been the easiest semester so far. Here is the rundown

Absue and Neglect - It's really sad and i've cried a couple times but all the information is more then intriging
Infancy and Childhood Development - The teacher is a sweetheart and i love leaning about infants
Infant Lab - This is the funnest thing ever, The Lab is so incredible!!! The school and parents around are really blesses to have such an amazing laboratory here at USU
Food Technology and Health - I get overwhelmed with all the new information but it's all pretty fascinating   Families and Cultural diversity - This class is hard for me becasue it's broadcast, I'm the only student at USU and it's 2 1/2 hours. I usually find myself stressing over something during it. It's laid back and the topics are fun though.  

Modern Dance - I miss Snow Colleges dance program, I feel bad that as big as USU is they dont have a dance program. It's really fun and relaxing but just not the same as Snow.

Thomas classes are going good to, he has a hard time with school but I'm proud for him for all the work he does. He is my hero. I Do my practicum and Graduate Summer 2011 if everything goes as planned. Wish  us luck :D     

Flying High

My dad took Thomas Asher and I flying. We started out in South Jordan and flew all the way to Logan. We saw Utah State University and even our mobile home park. Once we got up in the air Asher went straight to sleep. It was so much fun! I love my dad so much.