Tuesday, October 26, 2010

My Autistic Sister Lucky.




(My sisters name has been changed from personal preference)

When I was younger having an autistic sister was very hard for me. Sometimes I felt embarrassed, somethings I felt like she got more attention, sometimes my heart would break because she wasn't like me and sometimes I would shy away from being a good sister because I always felt guilty for not being a good enough sister. Lucky always had short hair when we were younger. When i was about 4 or 5, I decided to cut all my long curly locks to be just like her. I left the hair along the sidewalk and on our neighbors porch.

One day we were at the swimming pool and some stupid lady said to my sister, "this isn't the boys locker room," I loudly and NOT politely screamed at the lady stating that "Lucky is my sister, you dumb lady!!" I'm sure she meant no harm but i did mean to stand up for my beautiful sister. It was extremely hard for me when I got to high school and she was changing and becoming more familiar with life's natural experiences. She had taken my pants (again!!!!) and a note was left in the pocket. It was to her boyfriend!!! I couldn't bear sitting in class. I ran outside and couldn't breath. It was to overwhelming for me to handle. I wanted my big sister to stay innocent forever!

For some reason it was extremely hard for me to be my sister's role model. When she started idolising me, i absolutely hated it. I didn't want her to want to be me. I wanted her to be my role model. I wanted to idolize MY older sister. It took for me to move to Alaska and then off to college that this was o.k. I gave her every high school club shirt and her favorite was my Madrigal jacket. I know she felt so proud every time she put it on!!! I know I'm not perfect but it was in those times that I wished I had not been afraid of her being my best friend.

It's been way to long since I've seen my sister and i miss her dearly. It's so hard for me to know she cant have some of the same blessing that I've been able to experience in my life. Sometimes it's just to hard to handle. But in the end I am reminded by a few words that my mother sings" God so loved the world, that He gave His only begotten Son." It's more then overwhelming to know that when the right time comes my sister will be become perfect next to my side!!! What an amazing day to look forward to.

Thursday, October 14, 2010

Being Adopted

Today I had a cool experience. Today I stood in a line with a man, his hair looked like it hadn't been washed for days, his cloths looked ragged and torn. His countenance was one to fear but i was able to see a different side. I went to donate plasma today, i had a couple free hours because my boys were in Perry. This man told me he goes twice a week four weeks a month, becasue he doesn't have a job. I was studying for my abuse and neglect test and had my notes in hand. While donating he leaned over and said poliety

"Can i ask you a question," "Yes" I anwsered.
"I would be careful going into a field like that," he said. Why? I asked
"You have to deal with a lot of mean people," he said.
"My sons got taken away from me becasue I was smoking pot,"
I said " I was taken away from my home to when i was younger becasue I was in an abusive and neglectful situation to,"
"I know you loved you boys and I know that it was hard for you but i couldn't be more gratful for what my mother did for me when she gave me what i really needed"
I want to teach others that it's possible to have a really bad experience when young but still SUCCEED!
He started to cry, it was so sad. In that moment I had a much greater understanding of a man I though i never thought possible. At the same moment I couldn't be more grateful for my blessings and being adopted.
He had nothing else to say but that he though women were evil and the world is going to end in 2012.

When i got up I said to never give up, and to have a super amazing day :D
Sometimes you have to wonder if you made a difference, I hope somehow i did. 

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

TOdaY

Today is to forgive
Today is to not judge
Today is to know people make mistakes
Today is to stand up for what you believe
Today is to know people can change, if they desire 
Nobody else
Today is to smile
Today is to wonder
Today is to ponder

Today i want to scream
Today i want to fight
Today i dont understand
Today the world is changing
Today i get confused
Today i want to cry
Today my heart breaks
Today i question
Today i feel lost 

Today i pray
Today i know it will be alright
Today i know that God will protect me
Today i understand 
Today i need not worry
Today i feel comfort
Today i feel close

I know that today i must not worry about the past or fear the future, i must make today amazing and yes only I can truly make today amazing. 

Tuesday, October 5, 2010

Asher Wallace Lyon




These amazing picture were taken by Monarch Photography at Lanaya's wedding. Lanaya's wedding was fabulous. The temple was a special experience with a very amazing feeling. I could tell by watching Clark and Lanaya that they would be an incredible pair. I absolutely love this picture of Asher. He is a heart breaker. He is growing up so fast. I wanted to write some of my favorite things he does.

He is an amazing climber, seriously he can climb anything AND get back down
He will dance if you turn on music, it's my favorite thing in the world
He cuddles in the morning for about 7 min, that's a pretty long time
He gives little kisses, it's so cute and I can never get enough of them
He loves his daddy and cries when he leaves the house for school
He waves goodbye with his precious little hands
He really likes eggs, yogurt and anything sweet!
He is really smart and makes we worried he will out-do his parents
Asher is the sweetest thing you will ever meet, we are truly blessed to have such a sweet spirit in our home.